Recovery is a process. It takes time, consistency, willingness and an open mind to restore one’s health. I was really beating myself up for gaining weight and not being active over the last couple years; thankfully, the Cognitive Processing Therapy I was in had me challenge those thoughts and emphasize I do not have to be perfect to be loveable.
Over the last seven years, I have maintained my sobriety. That in itself was the hugest change I have ever made. You know within that time, I received multiple national teaching awards, started a blog, wrote 3 books, lost my dog, Copp, adopted many animals, experienced a traumatic accident, walked away from toxic people and work environments, started a YouTube channel and have been recognized as an emerging Canadian singer/songwriter. I’d say gaining weight doesn’t undue all the good I’ve done and experienced.
Life is all about overcoming adversity. I could easily have remained stuck in resentments, self-pity and continued on a path of self destruction. That’s easy! Change and transformation are difficult.
One of my closest girl friends suggested working with an online personal trainer. She got amazing results when she did the work. Just like recovery, resting on one’s laurels is dangerous and complacency is a killer. Well, I’ll be in a 6 week anxiety group in April, so I knew my journey to positive mental health is on par. However, my physical health needed an overhaul.
I’ve been able to pull off the weight gain as I’m confident and I continued to eat a healthy breakfast and vegetables. But, I know I wasn’t nearly eating the right foods nor being active. That’s part of identifying how the effects PTSD and stress were having on me. C’est la vie! I can now understand what was happening and now is the time to continue to work on my recovery and health.
Thankfully, I am in position to be able to work with a trainer and have the time and money to put in the energy needed to change my nutrition and exercise habits. Seeing as I’m vegan, many sources of protein such as lentils, chickpeas and black beans are really inexpensive. I had been in excellent shape before, but this time I didn’t quite know how to eat a balanced vegan diet. So just like recovery, I had to enlist someone else who has understanding and the experience of health I’m looking for.
Little by little things change, it’s a constant process. It’s important to be patient and to continue to be willing, honest and open-minded to change. I can say, being around someone who works out and meal preps definitely has been inspiring, and I’m grateful to have been put on the path of someone doing what I needed to change.
Thank you all for you love and support, I look forward to sharing this journey with you.
Miigwetch, Ekosi, Marci,
Brandi xo
Taryn Anderson MUA, photography
Krystaal Haluik hair
