It hurts my heart to share that another member of my family chose to take their own life. Suicide is a major trigger for me as I have lost several close family members and students as a result. A grieving Mother within my family shared that, “pain is the price we pay for great love.” This statement is something I’ve had ponder.
Right now, I have a lot on my plate, and I’m doing a lot of healing. The 12 week Cognitive Processing Therapy I was in just finished; thankfully I will be a in a 6 week follow up group focusing on anxiety. I know what it’s like to suffer with mental health issues and addiction. I have found refuge in recovery, help of health care professionals and in discovering the power of spirituality.
I used to live my life on self will alone. It was lonely and hard trying to do things all on my own. I can say there is strength in being vulnerable and humble enough to admit I don’t know everything and need help from others. Asking for help is not something natural for me, I’ve always found it easier to do things myself as people usually disappointed me and I knew I’d get things done on my own.
However that way of living took its toll on my soul. Now-a-days, I find it much easier to reach out and ask for help. There are many things I do not know and there are people who speak through my Higher Power and profoundly guide, direct and help me.
I’m sure you’ve felt some major pain in your life. It’s what we do with that pain that shapes our future and destiny. I use the pain I’ve been through to write, speak and sing.
My EP drops in 2021 and most of the singles from my first album are about painful relationships I’ve been in and out of. I’ve used my experiences in a way people can relate to. My first single Walk Away was all about having the guts to leave toxic relationships and workplaces in order to live a better life. My next single that is coming out May 1 is about no longer liking bad boys (who hasn’t like a bad boy/girl at some point in their life?).
It is my hope that I’m able to do what I love and make a living from it. My mental health has suffered these last couple years and there have been times I’ve felt extremely low. My heart goes out to you who feel hopeless I pray you may see better days.
I say give yourself a year, in a year from now things are going to be different and they can improve. I know how I felt last year at this time, I felt quite frustrated and defeated. However with therapy, time to heal and work on my mental health and being able to write/sing about my experiences I feel less hopeless.
Writing has been the best medicine I know, and I thank all of you who have followed my journey as a blogger, columnist, author and songwriter over the years.
I send those of you still suffering love and prayers. Do your best to love yourselves and do as little harm to others as possible. We are all in this life together, look out for your fellow person and love with your whole heart. We aren’t promised another day, all we have is right now be sure to tell those close to you that you love them.
I love you,
Brandi xo
Taryn Anderson photography
